西洋幽默语录(之五十八)
艾尔拔胡巴特 (HUBBARD, Elbert), 1856-1915
美国作家, 编辑, 和印刷商
Charity: a thing that begins at home, and usually stays there.
慈善: 始於家, 而通常也止於那里.
A conservative is a man who is too cowardly to fight and too fat to run.
保守的人太没胆去斗, 而且太胖跑不动.
Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive.
不要把人生看得太过严重, 否则你将无法脱身而存活下来.
Every tyrant who has lived has believed in freedom – for himself.
每个在世的独裁者都深信自由 - 为他自已的.
Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
天才或有其限制, 但愚蠢却从不受拘束.
If you have no enemies, you are apt to be in the same predicament in regard to friends.
假如你没有敌人, 在朋友的问题上, 你很容易碰到同样的困境.
If you lose in an argument, you can still call your opponent names.
假如你辩论输了, 你还是可以破口大骂对手.
A man is as good as he has to be, and a woman as bad as she dares.
男人越好越好, 女人越坏越好.
Man is Creation’s masterpiece; but who say so? – Man.
男人是上帝的创作, 但, 这是谁说的? – 男人.
A miracle: an event described by those to whom it was told by men who did not see it.
奇迹: 一个事件, 经过一些人绘声绘影, 而他们是从一些不曾亲身目睹的人口中得知的.
No man needs a vacation so much as the person who has just had one.
没有人比一个刚度过一个假期的人更需要多一个假期.
The object of teaching a child is to enable him to get along without a teacher.
教育儿童的目的是, 让他能够自立而不需要一个教师.
The path of civilization is paved with tin cans.
文明之道是由罐头食品来开路的.
Perfume: any smell that is used to drown a worse one.
香水: 任何气味用来淹没另一种更差的气味.
Repartee: any reply that is so clever it makes the listener wish he had said it himself.
巧答: 任何巧妙的回答, 让听者希望出自他口.
Secrets are things we give to others to keep for us.
秘密是我们给予他人, 并要求他替我们保存的东西.
To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.
要躲避批评, 什么都不做, 什么都不讲, 作个庸庸碌碌的人.
You can lead a boy to college but you cannot make him think.
你可以带领一个孩子上大学, 但你不能帮他想.
