西洋幽默语录(之一百一十四)
马克吐温 (TWAIN, Mark), 1835-1882
美国幽默作家和智者
Adam was human; he didn’t want the apple for the apple’s sake; he wanted it because it was forbidden.
阿当是有人性的; 他并不是为了苹果而要求苹果; 他要求苹果因为它是禁果.
All religions issue Bibles against Satan, and say the most injurious things against him, but we never hear his side.
所有的宗教都出圣经攻击撒旦, 而且用最具诽谤性的言论攻击他, 但我们从没听过他那一边的说法.
All that I care to know is that a man is a human being – that is enough for me; he can’t be any worse.
我只要知道人是人类 – 对我而言这就够了; 他不可能更坏.
April 1 is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other 364.
四月一日这个日子, 提醒我们在其他的三百六十四天, 到底是怎样的一个人.
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
银行家是当天气晴朗时, 借伞给你的人, 而只要一开始下雨, 他就要拿回.
Barring that natural expression of villainy which we all have, the man looked honest enough.
除却我们皆有的丑恶的自然表情外, 这个人看样子是够诚实的.
Be good and you will be lonesome.
做好人你将孤独.
By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity – another man’s I mean.
只要尝试, 我们可以轻易的忍受不幸 – 我的意思是别人的.
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
经典作品是每个人都得读而没人要读的.
The emperor sent his troops to the field with immense enthusiasm; he will lead them in person – when they return.
皇帝以最大的热诚欢送他的军队上战场; 他将亲自率领他们 – 当他们回来的时候.
The English are mentioned in the Bible: Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
英国人在圣经里有被提到: 温柔的人有福了, 因为他们将继承这个地球.
Everybody was sorry she died; but I reckoned with her disposition – she was having a better time in the graveyard.
每个人对她的死感到惋惜; 但我想以她的个性, 她还是在墓地里会过得好些.
The first half of life consists of capacity to enjoy without the chance; the last half consists of the chance without the capacity.
前半生包括有能力享受而没有机会; 後半生包括有机会却没有能力享受.
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
先把事实搞妥, 然后你就能随心所欲去扭曲它们.
